OPINION: Ask Candid Candace

Dear Candid Candace: Looking for some help here. I have always had a tremendous fear about buying gifts, especially during Christmas time. This year it’s kicking in big time and started very early. I think it began with a gift-panic stress stomach pain right after Halloween and it wasn’t from eating candy! Just the pressure and worry of what gifts to get for the coming holiday season. And, if I get a gift I don’t like, can I use it as a re-gift? Any help or suggestions on how to survive all the madness in the next few weeks and do the right thing would be much appreciated! -- Gagging on Gifts

Dear Gagging on Gifts: Isn’t this the annual stressor around the holidays? And it should be something you joyfully look forward to—finding the perfect gift for someone you love and then seeing their face light up with joy when it’s presented. But sadly, these days when there is such excess commercialism, some people never seem satisfied due to simple overabundance. And then, on the opposite end of the spectrum, think of all those who have to go without life’s littlest necessities. I think the greatest gift is donating to a charity for those less fortunate or, for many friends I know, they do both—buy for family and for someone in need. As far as finding the perfect gift, I am reminded of the O. Henry story, “The Gift of the Magi.” The story tells of a young husband and wife and how they deal with the challenge of buying secret Christmas gifts for each other with very little money. This short story puts gift giving in the right perspective. As far as re-gifting, I think it’s perfectly acceptable. Why toss something that may wind up in a landfill when that same item may be cherished by someone who will truly appreciate it? But make sure to avoid regifting within the same circle and pass it along only if it's in perfect condition! 

Dear Candid Candace: Kind of a sensitive topic here. The problem is my husband snores when he sleeps at night, and it has gotten progressively worse. It’s to the point now where I have trouble sleeping. I know other couples our age sleep in separate bedrooms because of the snoring (or smoking) and it seems to work out fine with them. But we have a great marriage and get along wonderfully, and I certainly don’t want to do anything to upset that. Do you think I should bring it up with my husband, or just let sleeping dogs lie, with the understanding that this particular “dog” isn’t sleeping too well lately?! --Rest In Peace?

Dear Rest in Peace: Actually, you do have a reason to be concerned. Sleep apnea can be a serious health issue as well as extremely frustrating and damaging to relationships. According to Dr. Madan Kandula, a board-certified ear, nose and throat specialist, “snoring is the sound of your body crying out for help.” He says that annoying snoring is literally the sound of somebody’s airway collapsing. Luckily, there are easy, simple solutions such as wearing a retainer that will hold your airway open during the night, among other procedures. Dr. Kandula says if the snoring is bad enough to where you don’t want to be there, then it’s time to see a doctor. There’s no easy way to tell if somebody just snores or if they have sleep apnea but if it makes you want to sleep in another room, I am guessing it’s the latter. You should definitely bring it up with your husband and then find a big set of ear plugs until you can get him to a doctor!